Tuesday, September 28, 2010


You lovers of the English language might enjoy this and find it uplifting. There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is 'UP.'

It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP ?

At a meeting, why does a topic come UP ?

Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election?

Why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?

We call UP our friends.

You can brighten UP a room and polish UP the silver.

We warm UP the leftovers and then clean UP the kitchen.

We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP old cars.

At other times the little word has real special meaning.

People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.

To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.

And this UP is confusing: A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP!

We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night.

We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP !

To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.

If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more.

When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out, we say it is clearing UP! When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP.

When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP. One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now. My time is UP, so......it is time to shut UP!

Oh . . . just one more thing: What is the first thing you do in the morning and the last thing you do at night?

U - P!!!!!!!!!

(OK, OK, I’ll go UP to my room.)

Friday, September 24, 2010


Personally, I have toiled for years on end trying to learn Spanish. I have not been very successful and probably won’t get much better at it. But, I will continue to try.

Let’s face it, learning any foreign language is a most difficult task unless you are subjected to the language from a very early age. Learning the English language has got to be one of the most difficult languages a person can attempt.

For example, if you were a teacher, how would you approach the following and convey the meaning(s) to your students??

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce .

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Without a doubt, English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France .

Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth?

One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not just one amend?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?

We have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all.

That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't 'Buick' rhyme with 'quick' ?

And I thought learning Spanish was difficult! Good luck to each and every one of you who are trying to learn English, or expand your knowledge of the language! It ain't easy, is it? (I feel the same way about learning Spanish!)

Friday, September 10, 2010


Recently, I’ve had a few inquiries as to why I haven’t posted a new blog lately. Well, to be perfectly honest, I haven’t had too much to say! I do not blog just to “blog”. There is plenty, actually too much, of that going on out there. I find most of those daily blogs to be dull, boring, and mundane all wrapped up in one. I’m not saying that my blogs are any better, they just aren’t a daily dose of “today I got up and then went to bed”. Really, who cares???

I try to post upbeat things about the wonderful area I have chosen to live in and some of the things I have done that I find interesting and exciting. I could easily be employed by the local Chamber of Commerce if we had such a thing! I try very hard to avoid controversial subject matter, and will not post political or religious subject matter blogs. I also try extremely hard not to post negative blogs and complain and whine about everything from the weather to the lousy neighbors and the fact that life has dealt me a hand in poker that won’t get me to the poker finals. We all have our problems and our ups and downs, but I don’t think they routinely make for good reading.

Actually, I am signed in to Google Analytics and I track my readership. I normally have up to 1,000 readers from 35 – 40 different countries. There are many bloggers who have considerable more followers than me, but that is not my goal. My goal is to keep my family and friends informed of what is going on with me in my retirement. For those of you that enjoy my writings, thank you very much and I will do my best to continue to keep you posted!

I am currently working on two blogs that I think you will find interesting. Stay tuned!